“I can’t DO it!” My youngest, Grayson, sopping wet from his bath, struggled to put his pajama shirt on. With both arms stuck halfway through his sleeves and jammed over his head, he looked like one of those headless monsters from Scooby Doo. All he needed was a spooky voice and the notion to chase me down the hallway.

Frustrated, he started to cry and stomp his feet.

“You can do it, Grayson.”

Frank and I try our best not to solve every problem for our boys. We want them to problem-solve and figure things out when possible, much to my children’s dismay.

His seemingly headless body turned to me. I couldn’t see his face, but I could imagine his scowl. “No, I can’t!”

I couldn’t help it. I started laughing.

“Stop waughing at me!”

I sometimes wonder how often God laughs at me when I throw small tantrums like Grayson. When I get so fed up and frustrated because I’m stuck, I just want to give up. But Paul’s reminder to the Philippians in chapter 4 gives me great encouragement. It’s one of my favorite verses and one I often utter to myself.

The publication journey feels insurmountable sometimes. There are some mountain peaks, but low valleys too. When I think about the statistical chance of getting published by a traditional publisher (nevermind one that’s well-known), I start to wonder what I’m doing. What’s the point? But then I remember where I was when God told me to write it.

“Write it? Me?”

“Yes, you.”

“God, you have met me before, right? You know I don’t finish stuff like this.”

“Girl, I knew you before you were knitted in your mother’s womb. I know about your self-doubt, your imposter syndrome, your ADHD, and your track record with finishing large projects (that quilt you made for your niece is still in your closet, by the way. It’s only been nineteen years…). You’re the one I want to write it.”

“But I don’t know how.”

“I’ll show you.”

“I’m going to need help. A lot of it.”

“I’ve taken care of that too. And you’ll meet lots of really great people in the process.”

“And you’re sure you want me?”

“Yep.”

“And you’ll be with me?”

“Every step of the way.”

That conversation happened almost three years ago. I now have a finished, edited draft (which is currently a semi-finalist in ACFW’s Genesis contest), and I’m working on a query letter, proposal, and marketing strategy. I still doubt (and I still say there were loads of people far more qualified than me to write this story), but He’s walked with me the whole way. Just like He promised. And He’ll walk with you too. Whatever slog you’re going through.

For those of you who are left wondering, Grayson eventually got situated, by himself. “See? I told you you could do it. Next time maybe you dry off a little better? And maybe try one arm at a time.”

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